IF i change it...

will you actually come?

YUCK

its not fair that I am the one going through all of this, while you run off and galavant in Banff, no doubt with HER... which is even more ridiculous as i almost feel like I am funding such excursions....
I'm moody, and pissy, and it downright sucks.
I cry, and no one is here to hold me, and tell me everything is ok.
You say i have your support but its funny, cause i'm not feeling it, maybe i'm just crazy, and being an overly emotional girl. and whatever i am being, i apologize, its not really me, nor is it really like me, but I can't seem to help it.

and i know you sit and say "its totally ok, its understandable, its crappy, try to let this go and stop feeling awful :)" and all i want to do is SCREAM at you at the top of my lungs, to just come and HOLD ME until I sleep.
is that so much to ask?

in other news, i am growing more and more excited to "get away" to edmonton for a few days. it will be good to stay away from this city for a night or two, and maybe think once more about moving there... which strangely seems like its becoming the best option. i'd miss YOU though.... even though you would probably say thats "too much", you have the best timing.

11 days.....

takes too long i think......
i don't know if i can handle this..

missing you

.......

The musical

Last night ..... My goodness I had forgotten how much I missed you and your touch


Don't stay away so long I kind of adore youtoo

how

how could you be so cruel???
and not even any of it to my face?
run away?
and then..........
wow

such...... hate.....

i'm not saying i'm perfect.
not at all....
but i've never been cruel.

and to deny a friendship.... why?
especially after ALL this time.....

"i'm being "mean" to you, and you're letting me" well thats quite the UNDERSTATEMENT....

ridiculous.

and you...... i'm sorry i can't say that enough, i'm sorry i got you in "trouble" and everything else. but thank you none the less. i hate the drift..... hate hate hate.